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The Johnsons 2016 “Emerald City” #causeifyoureseeningreen

So, this years #JohnsonDay was a family affair, literally! We had a ball! My little brother and cousin were our photographers. Our family friend was the photography assistant. Another cousin was our social media manager. She took all of the behind the scenes photos and videos for Instagram/Snap Chat. My little sister was the production assistant. (You may see her holding on to a document in some photos. That’s the Shot List that I, the director, created). My uncle was our host, and my aunt was the culinary team who fed us well when the shoot wrapped. Needless to say, I am a hot mess and put a TON of detail into these pictures. LOL. Because of all of the love that went into this project, I also included some behind the scenes and blooper photos.

I was a little behind this year coordinating. I drove my friends crazy venting about trying to put stuff together last minute. But I am happy that we pulled it off. This is literally my favorite day of the year! I am so thankful for family and friends who get just as excited about it as I do. Shout out to my husband and the Johnson kids who let me be great and go with the flow. LOL. Enjoy! #familytradition #HappyHolidays #wifediaries

Photographers: Kia Alston and Hunnit Geez Geezup

Makeup: Amber Myers

Hair: Shannon Reneè Riley

Balloons: Etsy @lolasconfettishop

Shanae’s Top: Etsy @cougarvintage

Other Clothing: H&M, Banana Republic, Amazon, Timberland, Aldo, JC Penny, Target, Primark

Take Care of Yourself

The top picture represents my daily life as a mother and wife, and the bottom shows how I’m really feeling these days.

I’ve been experiencing some health issues for a while now that I’ve been ignoring. I’ve been too busy worrying about my kids and my husband that I put myself on the back burner. I’ve been running around here, there, and everywhere nonstop, all while working full time and managing Wife Diaries. I’ve even scheduled doctor appointments only to reschedule them because of some conflict. I pushed myself to be super mom when I knew I needed rest. The thought of taking some time to relax and unplug stressed me out because I felt like I had too many people depending on me to rest, and I need to be present and available at all times. I wasn’t listening to my body.

Yesterday, I finally made it to see my doctor. He ran tests and checked my symptoms and asked, “Are you getting any rest? Is there anything that you can think of that may be stressing you? What’s a typical week like for you?” I then went into how I live this great life with a wonderful husband and 3 fabulous children and how I balance their busy schedules with my own, not even realizing that any of it could be a factor in my health. I honestly thought that, my schedule being a factor, was bizarre because I’m extroverted and I enjoy being busy. But I knew that my symptoms weren’t normal and that something was wrong.

I was in the hospital all afternoon with my parents by my bedside, and my husband worried sick thousands of miles away on FaceTime. The doctors were telling me to relax as they ran tests; but all I could think about was that I needed to be discharged in time to make it to my babies camp closing program and to take my eldest daughter to dance. Crazy right! I made a comment about it, and mother told me to basically not worry about any of that, and that the kids will be fine.

After I was discharged and given my followup information, I was relieved because I was able to jump back into being “super mom”. I made it to my babies performance and my daughter made it to her rehearsal. But I was still feeling the same way I felt when I started this whole process.

As I sit here and type, waiting to be seen by the doctor again, I am no longer in denial. I didn’t want to believe that something as simple as stress could sit me down. I guess because I viewed my stress as “good” stress. Of course my life isn’t perfect, but I surely didn’t think that the busyness of it would make me sick.

You know that saying “stress can kill you”? Yeah, I’ve never paid any attention to it either, but now I understand. Everyone needs rest and relaxation. Unplugging is necessary for your health. It’s ok to utilize your village to help run your errands for the kids, even if you are simply taking a nap. And the big one, you don’t have to attend EVERY event. Constantly ripping and running will wear you out and can be damaging.

I’m no expert, and it’s going to probably take me a second to practice to my own advice; but I am someone who is currently experiencing the side effects of stress, and it’s not fun at all. Listen to your body. Slow down and take care of yourself; because if you don’t, you won’t be able take care of anyone else. #WifeDiaries

Written By: Shanaè M. Johnson

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Register for #RRR2016 at www.foreverywhine.org/retreat

The Johnsons Cancun Anniversary Photoshoot

As you know, Scott and I recently celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary in Cancun, Mexico. While planning the trip, I decided to research local photographers to capture some memories for us. Thanks to Google, I came across Monica Lopez Photography

We needed this vacation so bad! Our hectic schedules and children were taking over our marriage and we just needed a break. Being in Cancun gave us the re-connection that we were yearning for. We had so much fun that we barely have and pictures in our phones. Can you believe it?! We actually sat our phones down. However, the shoot we did with Monica are all the photos that we need. I shared with her that I am not a big fan of our original wedding photography, and she was able to recreate our day in an hour shoot. I am still blown away by the pictures. OMG! They are truly amazing! I wish we could hire Monica for all of our photography needs. She is THE BEST! We had so much fun. It was one of the highlights of our vacation. I am so glad that I connected with her. Thanks Google!

If you are ever in Cancun, I highly recommend booking Monica for your photography needs. 

SN: So many people were telling us about that “7 year itch” thing saying that Scott and I were going to be sick of each other and the whole bit. But we don’t receive that. Sure we get on each others nerves from time to time, but ain’t nothing gonna break us a part. We are in this for the long run. Why would anyone even make that comment to us anyway?! Rhymes with later… I know right. #TeamJohnson

The Johnsons Mexican Adventure

Hola! The Johnsons had an AMAZING time in Cancun, Mexico celebrating our 7th wedding anniversary. I wish we were still there! We stayed at the beautiful Hyatt Zilara Cancun adult only all-inclusive resort that deserves every bit of its #2 rating on Trip Advisor, should be #1 though.

While in Cancun, I scheduled a beach photoshoot, which I will share the photos from later, and we also went on a jungle adventure, zip lining and carrying on. I wasn’t really too thrilled about the jungle stuff and getting dirty, but because my husband was such a good sport about the “anniversary photoshoot”, I had no choice but to do something that he wanted to do. Let me tell you, I am so glad that I did because it was FUN! My non-swimming self even jumped into the lagoon. I was a little scared at first, but the guys at Selvatica Cancun were so nice, and they were eye candy too might I add, that I instantly felt comfortable. My husband was making fun of me because he said my voice changed when I was talking to them. LOL. (So glad he’s not an uptight insecure husband).

Anyway, we had a BLAST! Never in a million years would I think that I would do something like this, but I did it with my best friend. I even broke a nail and didn’t complain. I hadn’t had that much fun in a long time. I hope you enjoy the photos. Feel free to LIKE, COMMENT and SHARE.

Vacationing Without Your Spouse…

A good friend once told me that she has never traveled without her husband. She shared that even when she goes to women only events, he accompanies her and stays at the hotel while she participates in the festivities. I gave her a strange look because I was a little shocked. I guess I unintentionally put wives like that in a box and imagined them as introverts who lacked social lives. Judgy, I know… But this friend of mine has a very vibrant social life. In fact, she is always traveling and entertaining. I would have never guessed that her husband was waiting in the room or somewhere while she’s hanging with the girls.

Anyway, I am the type of wife that is fine with traveling without Mr. Johnson. I have been on several girl trips and he has also vacationed with the guys without me for bachelor parties or whatever. It really doesn’t bother either of us. And honestly, I never really saw it as an issue or something to think about as a wife. That’s me being closed minded I guess.

But aside from that, I’ve heard husbands and wives state that they won’t ever travel without the other. I’ve even received that they either refuse to and/or aren’t “allowed”. The one couple that I heard this from also went on a tangent about how spouses are supposed to be each other’s best friends, and if you are married, you shouldn’t have the desire to travel with anyone else. 

I get all of that “my husband is my best friend” stuff, but my husband ain’t a girlfriend. For me, I need the friendships that I share with my girls and the time to travel with them alone and do stuff that us women enjoy doing like talk, shop, drink, and take beach selfies. There was a period in between me getting married and having babies where I felt like my girlfriends forgot about me, and I was unintentionally labeled as the married friend that is only interested in cooking, cleaning, and doing homework. But that’s not me at all. Of course I like catering to my man, and mothering my children, but I like to go out and be fun and loud Shanae with my girls from time to time.

I’m not criticizing anyone’s marriage. If you like to be up under your husband and children 24/7, that’s great. But as for me, I feel like separate vacations ain’t never hurt nobody. Plus Mr. Johnson and I need our “free time” to hang with our friends and just BE. We both are very content in our marriage and don’t feel the need to stop our social lives or cut out our single friends because we have a best friend that lives with us. It’s just how we roll.

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What are your thoughts? Do you feel that married couples should or should not travel without each other? #WifeDiaries

#RelationshipGoals Side Eye

The phrase “Relationship Goals” has been used extremely loosely on social media (almost as much as the word “LOVE” in life). People are quick to ‪#‎RelationshipGoals‬ on photos of smiling couples. However, they don’t know what went into the getting those smiles. I get it, you see a cute couple, perhaps a celebrity couple that always looks happy; so since you admire their happiness, you say things like you aspire to have love like that one day or you hope your marriage could be like theirs. But is that the relationship goal? Is the goal to be happy or is the goal to have someone elses happiness? Let me make it plain.

Mr. Johnson and I have a beautiful marriage. It has its ups and downs but all in all, its pretty dope. However, when people #relationshipgoals us, although its flattering, it kind of makes you wonder if they really understand how we make this thing work. Like would they be willing to swallow the 15 years of stuff that went into making our relationship as strong as it is? Or would they hear one of our stories and say “I could never…”.

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Often times we are surprised by the couples we look up too. Especially celebrities. We judge our love for them based off of pictures without knowing the true true. I’m not naming any names, but we raised our eyebrows recently about an admirable couple who, turns out, had an open marriage; and another even had kids on the side. That’s not me judging because that works for them, which is totally my point. You have to be careful what you wish for. Its ok to wish for marriage and happiness, but not “like theirs”. You can’t just go around claiming everything. Words have power you know. That’s Vision Board 101. (Don’t put Idris on your board cuz he ain’t knocking at your door. LOL)

Every marriage is different, and of course I have ones that inspire me. I have friends in my head like Aisha and Steph just like everyone else. I’m just saying that my #RelationshipGoals are my own. ‪#‎WifeDiaries‬

Am I looking to deep into this phrase? Whats your take?