My husband really impressed me last weekend. You see, last week was our sons birthday and my husband insisted that I let him plan the party on his own. I was a little nervous because he’s not really great at planning anything without my assistance. The guy is just getting comfortable taking our kids to the doctor by himself and filling out their paperwork (he said that our 9 year old helped him fill it out the last time, lol). With a little resistance, I finally gave in and let him go for it.
On the day of the party, it was so cute seeing him running around to pick up the cake, party bags, and preparing. It was at a skating rink and he had a basketball theme for our son. (I know girl, he had a theme and all and it was consistent. I was shocked too). A ton of kids showed up. So many that my husband needed a shot of tequila when he got home after paying the bill, but it was well worth it. Our son had an amazing time.
The moral of the story is, us mommy/wives don’t have to do EVERYTHING for the kids. When our husbands or family members offer to help, we need to start saying yes (if you are a control freak like me, yes is hard to say). Saying yes to my husband and not interfering in the planning was a load off of my shoulders. I was already running around all weekend with our girls with dance and photoshoots, so my cape was getting a bit worn. But he has a cape too. So I’m glad I let him put it on. Oh how I love him so. #WifeDiaries
Dear Future Husband (Witcho’ fiiiiine and sexy self),
Today is Valentine’s Day … And although we honor each other every day, today is about to be the best day you’ve had in a long tiiiiiiime. Today is the day that I decided to put ministry down for a minute, turn off the phone and email, put the needs of our multi-million dollar business to the side and not work the product line and book tour. Naw babe. We off dat’ today. Today is the day that I honor you for coming into my life at a time I least expected. You truly love God and because of that you love ME with all of your heart and soul. And did I mention how fine you are? You show me daily that I’m more than enough and you honor and protect me in ways I never knew existed. You make this “second time around” worth it. You are amazing. And fine. And simply amazing. And like really really FINE! Let’s do this … Forever.
I’ll admit, I am a very spoiled wife. I’ve never taken out the trash (I barely know when trash day is). I don’t know how to do any car maintenance except put gas in my tank. I can’t tell you the last time I changed a light bulb. I don’t recall a time that I shoveled snow or mowed the lawn. You get it. I’m spoiled. It probably sounds like some old school gender roles stuff, but it works for my marriage.
Fast-forward to this week. It snowed twice in sunny Philadelphia. I’m talking enough snow to cover the car. My husband and I were rushing around trying to get the kids off to school and make it to work on time. He normally does morning drop offs, so he and the kids left before me. Thinking that my car would be warmed up, cleaned off, and ready to go, I proceed to our driveway. I was in for a rude awakening. My car hadn’t been touched. It was then that I realized that I, Shanae Johnson, would have to physically clean my car of all by myself! I went to my trunk and got the brush thingy out and started to brush off the snow and scrape off the ice. I was freezing and pouting like a baby. How could Mr. Johnson do me like this? Why would he not clean off my car for me? He couldn’t have been that much in a rush. I was in my feelings for like five minutes, no lie. And I was dead serious.
I started to call my husband to fuss and whine, but then I heard the voice of Judge Lynn Toller. You know, the judge from Divorce Court. I remember her laying this one wife out for complaining about stupid stuff when she had a great man. I also remember fussing the wife out myself through the tv as I watched. It was at that moment that I realized that I was that spoiled and ungrateful wife willing to start an argument about something silly. I am physically capable of cleaning snow off my car. I just didn’t feel like it. But again, it is my car, so its my responsibility right. My husband was just doing it normally as a courtesy because he knows his wife doesn’t want to do anything that will cause a nail to break. So what he forgot this time, or simply just didn’t do it. Is it really worth me shaking up the house about. I really had to check myself.
A lot of times, us wives have to learn not to sweat the small stuff. Do I want to take out the trash? Hell no! But can I? Yes. I had to open my eyes and see that I have a great man. One that loves me with every fiber of his being and one that will go to the moon and back just to see me smile. So in conclusion, I ain’t mad no more about cleaning the snow off the car. I’m actually grateful that I’ll be married 7 years in May and this was the first time I had to do it. wink emoticon #WifeDiaries
Ok, so I know I am a little late, but I am all caught up on my guilty pleasure, the Real Housewives of Atlanta. In this last episode, the couples went on a trip to Jamaica! How fun is that! Anyway, y’all know how much I respect Kim Fields, but why in the world would she think its ok to take her children on an adult trip? I would have been so annoyed on that bus trying to watch what I say because her kids are present. She should have at least met the gang at the resort, and not rode on the group bus, out of consideration. Just my opinion…
If you have ever been on an adult trip, you know how turned up it can be. For my husband’s 30th a couple years ago, I surprised him with a trip to Miami with our friends. We had a ball! We partied from the time we boarded our flight in PHL, until the time we landed back in our great city. Our trip was similar to the one taken on the show. Our group was mostly couples, but we did have a few friends who flew solo. It didn’t matter though. We all had a phenomenal time. Below are a few photos.
Moral of the story, if I plan an adult vacation, please don’t bring your kids. But if you must, keep them hidden, because honestly, if I don’t have my kids with me, I don’t want to see anyone else’s either. That might come across as harsh, but that’s just my take… #wifediaries
Y’all know me. I love taking a good family picture. But sometimes, the perfect picture is harder to capture than one would think. One year, I went as far as to photoshop my babies face from one photo onto another to get the perfect shot. (Thanks Brother Marcus for assisting me with that). Extreme, I know. But it turned out to be my favorite family photo of us.
Anyway, sometimes our marriages can be as disconnected as this photo. We can all be off doing our own things and unable to come together as a unit and smile. There was a period in our marriage where my husband and I were so caught up with work and the kids schedules, that we were too exhausted to do anything else. By the time we got home, pillow talk was non-existent and we would start the whole process over again the next day. It was like a routine. We worked, I took the girls to dance, he took our son to basketball, we would get home, eat dinner, do homework, and go to sleep. And then we would get up the next morning mad that we didn’t hit a home run in the bedroom because we were so tired. It was a mess.
But then we decided to make our time together as well as quality time as a family a priority. Date nights are a must, even if they are in the house. We have to communicate with each other. That means asking how each others day was. We must pray together as a couple. I know it may sound cliche, but prayer really does change things. Its important that we fit that time in where we can because that time spent together is essential to our marriage.
I’m not saying that its a sin to go to sleep when you get home, or that you should never be tired. However, we as married couples must make sure that we do not get so caught up in routine, that we forget about us. We must continue to love on one another. Be able to look at the camera. And smile. #WifeDiaries